Peace and Relaxation

Today is going to be a good day. I love days like today.

Adam is up in Pulaski, fishing, until Wednesday. Nicole is working. It's too cold and windy to play outside. So, it's a quiet day just relaxing with Miranda. I have no where to go. No errands to run. All my chores are pretty much done. Miranda and I spend a lot of quality time together on these days. I'm sure we'll play some board games, do some crafts, maybe go for a walk. We'll read books and play with her toys. I'm not really a morning person so in the morning we usually just veg out and watch PBS together. I'll sit and have my coffee, she'll have breakfast and play quietly with her toys.

I love having only one child right now. If it's one thing I notice about all the blogs that have two or more children is that life is more chaotic, hectic and noisy. I'm looking forward to that chaos, some day, but for now I'm so incredibly grateful for these special years I've had with just Miranda. I never felt like I'd be one of those moms that has a bunch of children close in age. I just can't imagine that. Miranda will be the only one of my children to ever experience being an only child. I've had plenty of time and opportunity to enjoy her baby years. She'll be an older preschooler by the time a sibling comes along and I imagine she'll have a much greater sense of self than she would then if she was 2 or a young 3. I'm hoping she'll remember at least some of these special moments we've had.

Miranda and I have always had a very special bond. From the moment she was born, I've felt it. I knew she was special. Her birth was so perfect and everything went so right. I only breastfed her for a short time, so that's not it. No, I think the reason for our connection is the fact that I've been the only steady, reliable person in her whole life. Adam would leave for training when she was a tiny infant, he left for Iraq when she was only 5 months old. We moved shortly after that to my mother's house. Shortly after that we moved into our own place. She saw Adam briefly when he first came home from Iraq and then he was gone for a month again. Even now he's always going somewhere. I've stayed home with her for most of her life so I've just always been there. I've always been the one in the middle of the night to comfort her fears and make sure she's warm and comfortable. I'm the one who kisses her boo-boo's. We're usually together.

I love our bond. I love that I'm the first person she runs to when she's crying. I love that I'm often, the only person who can get her to calm down. I hope that we are always this close. She is such a special little girl. She's my saving grace. She helped me heal after a difficult time. I try so hard to be the best mom that I can without spoiling her. I know our relationship will change when I do have another child but I hope it's for the better. For now I will enjoy her and be with her as only we can be.

Time to go play Candy Land! :) Have a happy Monday everyone!